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Sexism in Gaming

girls in gaming sexism opinons competitive gaming melee fgc uhh... gamergate??

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#1 LazyyDogg

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Posted 26 May 2015 - 09:53 PM

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As a female enthusiast of the interactive arts, especially as one who is competitive and strives to best her opponents, i've seen my fair share of unfair remarks against my gender. These remarks have veried between the slightly rude but unintentional to straight-up threats of rape (no,really). They mostly lie somewhere in the middle. 

 

This veries from region to region, of course, and here in Washington a lot of people are generally proud of "acceptance" and "equality" in everyday matters. Pot is legal and so are gay marriages. Seattle is a center for many gay rights movements as well as feminism and all that. And that's cool and everything, but i'm honestly a very self-involved person and not incredibly active outsid the few communities imma part of.

 

One of these is the Smash community. Overall, i found that girl players, while still rare, are relatively well-treated nowadays and this only seems to be improving. But theres still a long ways to go. It's still annoying to find a girl pop up on a Twitch stream and have the chat immediately explode with "omg its a grill!! she's so hot! like a 7/10!!" It's even more annoying when they say, "oh she's actually pretty good" when she's getting rekt and is obviously a noob. And of course its most annoying when the chat gets angry and turns against her and starts calling her an attention whore or worse...

 

Milktea, who you might know from the Smash Documentary, is one of my favorite women in gaming because I find in her a lot of parallels to myself. Like me, she grew up being bullied for being Asian, and she struggled with her shyness. The biggest thing Milktea and i have in common, of course, is our love for gaming. particularly, our love for Smash. Also just like her,i used to despise other gaming girls (or any nerd-girl) for the same reason some male gamers would hate me: I would just think they only did it for the attention.

 

Milktea, aka Lilian Chen, has become a prominent spokesperson for women in gaming. I especially love her non-hostile approach. She doesn't aim to accuse and shame male gamers for some of their past actions. Her key to raising awareness is empathy, which is a quality i've always strived to develop in myself.

 

Here's a recent TEDTalk by Lilian Chen where she talks about everything I just said but better. Just pretend she's me!

 

 

I know this forum is dominated by male gamers, but i'd love to hear your opinion on the matter in general, if you have one. I don't mean to stir up some heated debate on sexism and repression of women and all that. I'm not a Social Justice Warrior. In fact, they're the very reason i left Tumblr.

 

No, the point i want to make is that i'm better than all of you. wait... nope. that's not it.

 

Okay, the point I want to make is simply to raise a lil bit of awareness. I doubt any of you have been completely oblivious to this issue, but as male gamers, holy shit do you guys have it easy. I've found acceptence and even made good friends through gaming nowadays, but... still to this day, at nearly every tournament, convention, comic book store or hobby shop I set foot in, I am awkwardly approached, stared at, patronized, assaulted with questions, put-down, insulted, idolized or villainized (that would be in order of least to worst).

 

I joke a lot at the fact that i'm a girl gamer. I poke fun at myself a lot sometimes because if I make other people aware that, "hey, she's a grill!" it'll help develop the idea that, "hey, she's just a nerd like me!" Other times, I will admit, I do like the attention. But whenever someone questions my nerd-cred, my love of the subject, it can be more than frustrating.

 

Thankfully, i think i've found a nice lil community here that doesn't yet seem to have any problems with my gender. Which is amazing, really. Great job guys. Of course, the anonimity of the internet helps a bunch, but you'd be surprised at how many angry tweens on forums who've never met me irl sent me hostile PMs because say their girlfriend since kindergarten just dumped him and now all girls are evil and so its all my fault. ● ﹏☉ But thats actually a hilarious example. There were much worse ones...

 

I hope i'm not sendin the wrong message here. this is my first real topic on Chozo Sanctuary, and I don't want to seem like some preachy, pissed-off feminist. I'm not a fantastic writer so i only hope this makes sense. Really, i just watched that TEDtalk and it stirred up a desire to say something about it.

 

Just food for thought. You may feed me back if you wish. Lazyy: signing out.


Edited by LazyyDogg, 27 May 2015 - 09:39 AM.


#2 Billy "Buford" Morgil

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 03:10 AM

Pot is legal

Boo! >:(

and so are gay marriages.

Yeah! :D

Like me, she grew up being bullied for being Asian,

Wait, you're Asian?!

and she struggled with her shyness.

Despite not being a girl, i can totally relate with the shyness thing. Being in a text-only environiment like this definitely helps, as is the fact that i've gotten to know most of the people here pretty well, but it's still a pretty big issue with me when meeting new people, both online and off.

I actually don't have any problems with girl gamers, Hell, if i could find a girl where i live who was as big a gaming and anime fan as i am, i wouldn't be a lonely 30 year-old virgin. And while yes, i have flirted with some of the girls that have joined our site over the years, i'm not trying to be creepy, but just that i'm legitimately attracted to someone who has similar interests as me. Despite they're inexplicable hate for me, i legitimately enjoy racing against the ladies in Mario Kart every thursday. They put up a good competition, just as much as the guys that play in our tournament. And while i really do not give a shit for let's plays or twitch streams or what not (why watch someone else play when i can just play it myself? I think even South Park asked that question once), when i do watch gaming videos on youtube, i really don't give a shit about the gender of the person talking, just so long as they know their stuff. And trust me, there are a lot of idiot poser guys out there, too.

EDIT: BTW, to illustrate the shyness issue, i took way too long (especially when i'm supposed to be getting ready for work) going over the wording of my post before hitting submit to make sure everything was clear and I didn't say anything that would be misinterpreted and piss somebody off. Or at least with the serious part, not so much the cheap jokes at the beginning.

Edited by Morgil, 27 May 2015 - 03:33 AM.


#3 Bobby Lee "Buford" Robok

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 05:56 AM

I've been here for one year +4 days.  I haven't seen anyone really say sexist comments in the way you're describing. Actually most of the people here are pretty mature and I think that's why I can relate and I stay here. Older people have experience in life hurting other's feelings so they know what to say and how it would affect someone. Take young (stinky) boys at a smash tourney whose egos are sensitive and easily shattered and throw a girl into the mix and you have a recipe for what you've dealt with. Boys are like that to each other, and it doesn't hurt their feelings as much as it hurts a girl's, especially the adjectives that they would throw at a girl in anger can be much more harmful. It's good that you're trying to improve it. I know it will get better with age and time. I'll never forget the time I've felt sexism directly wass when I was 12 in karate, we went to a tournament and the only opponent in my 110lb weight class was a 16 year old girl. I had to spar with her and she blocked all my punches and accidentally broke my nose, once there's blood the sparring has to end. All of my friends were laughing at me that I got beat a girl, but the worst was that she was saying it too from across the room along with her Dad who was proud his daughter beat a boy. Even though I tried to tell my friends she was really good they wouldn't listen and just laugh at me. So what sexism was hit me like a knee in my face. I actually thought about this two weeks ago when you said "Plant you got beat by a girl" LOL. :P But I know that was different lol.

 

Good for you Lazyy, I like when people try to actually change something rather than complain and not do anything. I hope you continue to find a fun environment with the people here. :) Also, holy shit I've been here for over a year!



#4 Lame "PBluafnotr4d2" 87421F

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 02:30 PM

Tits or GTFO.

 

Wait, that didn't come out right at all... :P

 

 

Well, first of all, I wanna say "I CALLED IT!!!" to everyone who I told I thought you were azn based off your Mii. Hehe, I don't expect it to look anything like you at all, except for her hair, but I think I've told people on the Mumble chat that I thought you were azn because you made an azn-y Mii, and now I can claim the cool points! :D

 

 

Soooo, @ the topic:

 

What's my take on girl gamers? I like them. A girl who plays games is instantly more attractive to me for it. Not necessarily physically, but more appealing desirable at least, which makes me happier to be around them.

 

Do I objectify girls and agree with those who do so? Well, with my negative tone, you can already tell that's a "no." I hate it every time when... well, you prolly won't get this reference because you hate IGN and avoid it like Las Plagas, but I hate it every time when IGN videos featuring Naomi Kyle are riddled with comments in the vein of "You're so hot," or "Have my babies," or even  "You're putting on a little weight." Seriously, shut the fuck up, guys. You're not doing anything good by posting that shit, and besides, Jessica Chobot was hotter.

 

Do I think they're attention whores? No.  While I think that gamer girls may enjoy the attention they get from playing video games, I don't think they do it because they want the attention. They play games because they like games. If they wouldn't, then they'd join the ranks of girls who don't care about sitting down to game with their boyfriends. It's not like Twitch is overpopulated with females. They want to broadcast their gameplay just as much as all the other "attentionfags" who Twitch out their own shit. They're just playing their game and providing it for others who are interested to stream.

 

What's my take on Bitches on Twitches? I like them. :) I actually prefer them. I don't really watch many Twitch feeds unless it's EVO Smash, but I have watched a few Twitch feeds on my PS4 when I wanted to see gameplay from a game I don't have or couldn't actually play a game myself at the time, and I think that I chose to watch a female's feed every one of those times. Why? Well, I find it more interesting. First of all, I enjoy watching other females playing hardcore games, because again, I don't really see that much IRL. I also typically enjoy their commentary better. It's more fun to see how a girl might think and the gameplay choices that she makes while she plays games. And yeah, they're also prettier than the guys. This is the same mentality that causes me to pick a female character in Pokémon games every time I'm given the option. But I'm not going to comment on the video saying, "Oh my god, you're so pretty! You play games, you're actually not very bad at them either, and yet you're still easily a 7/10!"  Saying that shit takes a lot of nerve... or maybe just a lack of pubes. I agree with Robox when he said that this kind of shit can result from immaturity or lack of life experience, discerning between the kinds of comments that hurt feelings.

 

Do I expect most girls to suck more at video games than guys? On average, yes. WHOA WHOA WHOA, dem fukken fightan woydz!!! But I have a logical explanation for this. On average, girls do not play video games nearly as extensively as boys do. With less exposure to video games--as is the case with every other activity--comes lower proficiency. Now, does this mean that a girl who invests as much time into gaming as guys do--especially competitive gaming--will not be as good as a guy simply because they were born with a nice rack female? No way. Gaming is not an athletic sport. I've learned from my teaching class training shits that boys are proven to be generally better in whole body activities (which is why they feel the need to get up and run and shit more), whereas girls are better at working carefully and accurately with their hands (which is why you see better sewing work and their handwriting doesn't suck ass compared to that of the average cockbearer). Taking this into consideration, one could argue that females have greater potential for video game skill, but then again, video games don't require very precise inputs; the term "button masher," which is commonly applied to many video games, demonstrates quite the opposite. BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THIS SHIT:

 

>>Tee Ell; Dee Arr: Girls in general are worse than the average male gamer due to their comparatively lower average time wasted on playing video games, but that doesn't mean that those higher-percentile girls can't rock it out with the hardest of the males. It's just that there are fewer girl gamers out there, and most of the ones who do exist are not as into it as the guys are, which means less exposure, less practice, lower proficiency.

 

Was I surprised by your performance the first time I played you in Sm4sh? Absolutely.

And was the fact that you are a girl a contributing factor in my impression? Yes. But that's because you're not part of the norm. You are one of the relative few who break that mold. It's hard enough to find gamer girls around me, period, let alone one who could kick my ass in Smash--the game at which I am most competitive. So, it was a surprise, but a very pleasant one. Would I say, "You're good for a girl?" Sure, I can say that, because you're better than most... no, fuck that, ALL other girl Smashers I've ever come across; but I primarily say, "You're fuckin' good, period." You're better than most GUYS here at this forum.

 

 

Overall, I like girl gamers, especially the more competitive ones which invested as much time into hardcore gaming as I do and can bring the serious competition. I like them because they are as passionate about gaming as I am, which is further heightened considering how they're "diamonds in the rough." It's hard to find a girl who enjoys playing video games on a regular basis, and even more so one who plays hardcore games and strives to develop her skills in them. If more girls of this kind existed, they wouldn't be idolized as they are today.  Guys who speak misogynistic things towards female gamers are just immature and/or frustrated with their own lives, which makes them all the more pitiful.

 

...Did I forget to address something? I read the OP this morning while taking a shit, but I couldn't respond until now. :P

 

 

A final thought: Plant just loves to joke around a lot and talk in the least politically incorrect manner available. ^_^ All those strike-through'd comments were for lulz, as was "Bitches on Twitches." There really isn't a racial slur or profanity that I wouldn't use. The only ones that are sometimes offensive me (depending on the context of its use) are the variants of "goddamn," but even I'll say that shit when I rage hard enough. If you're a girl, you're a bitch; if you're a guy, you're a fag: That's just a fact of life! :D I even jokingly would refer to my own girlfriend or that of another as their "bitch," but I don't literally mean it as "your bitch" as in someone for you to order and push around to get whatever you want. When referring those lovely girls as "bitches," I mean it in a really nice way! :)



#5 CONKERSBADFURDAY

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 02:59 PM

In a world with less flaws, the whole notion of "GIRL GAMERS ARE ICKY AND ATTENTION WHORES" really shouldn't exist at all, or at its best, should be something people outgrow as they get older. I certainly wasn't a saint when I was in high school and on the internet, and while I was never outright hateful towards the women gamers I ran across, I did find some of the "lawl no women on the internet" jokes funny. Thus, I repeated them. Color me obnoxious, whatever terrible shade of green that probably is.

 

Got a bit older, started playing World of Warcraft, and found myself in guilds with tons of women gamers. That was cool! I got it, and it was nice to see some variety in the player base. But damn, that whole "some women play these games to prey upon men and get free shit" is true. I came across them, got fucked out of time and loot, and  yeah, I was pissed.

 

But the thing about getting older is you start to realize one bad apple doesn't mean all the apples are shit. Fuck, most apples are good. I'm drinking apple brandy right now. it's amazing. Go get some.

 

At the point in my life now, I...well, I don't online game much anymore. When I do, I turn off all headsets and blare music so loudly that anyone screaming at me becomes a garbled part of the background. It's just easier that way, and since I suck at almost all online games I play now, it's also better.

 

So there's my personal experience. Let's return to my first paragraph though:

 

The fact that a great many people do not grow out of the "GIRL GAMERS EW ICKY" thing is really just revolting. We're living in a society where "manchildren" isn't just an insult but a 100% apt description of people that need a good hard slap and to stare into the face of reality until they shit their pants and realize how fucked they are. Won't happen though. At least not for awhile. I do think socially, time will get rid of those people. I certainly hope so. But then you have MRA groups out there who are legit pissed at the new Mad Max movie because there's a woman lead and she's really badass and that's just not right, well...fuck. I can't think of a movie with more testosterone in it than that one.

 

On the whole, I think it comes down to people growing up and improving naturally. Soon that will be less of an issue because there are more girl gamers than ever. But the other groups out there, well, the'll just be hate-filled shitcunts until the day they die. Society has improved so much over the last few hundred years, but it has a long ways to go, and there's just a certain breed of person that probably won't ever die out.

 

Boo! >:(
 

You're an idiot.



#6 LazyyDogg

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 05:46 PM

Boo! >:( Yeah! :DWait, you're Asian?!
Despite not being a girl, i can totally relate with the shyness thing. Being in a text-only environiment like this definitely helps, as is the fact that i've gotten to know most of the people here pretty well, but it's still a pretty big issue with me when meeting new people, both online and off.

I actually don't have any problems with girl gamers, Hell, if i could find a girl where i live who was as big a gaming and anime fan as i am, i wouldn't be a lonely 30 year-old virgin. And while yes, i have flirted with some of the girls that have joined our site over the years, i'm not trying to be creepy, but just that i'm legitimately attracted to someone who has similar interests as me. Despite they're inexplicable hate for me, i legitimately enjoy racing against the ladies in Mario Kart every thursday. They put up a good competition, just as much as the guys that play in our tournament. And while i really do not give a shit for let's plays or twitch streams or what not (why watch someone else play when i can just play it myself? I think even South Park asked that question once), when i do watch gaming videos on youtube, i really don't give a shit about the gender of the person talking, just so long as they know their stuff. And trust me, there are a lot of idiot poser guys out there, too.

EDIT: BTW, to illustrate the shyness issue, i took way too long (especially when i'm supposed to be getting ready for work) going over the wording of my post before hitting submit to make sure everything was clear and I didn't say anything that would be misinterpreted and piss somebody off. Or at least with the serious part, not so much the cheap jokes at the beginning.

 

I do love that you took forever writing your post. Took me almost all of yesterday to write mine (and it still had spelling errors) because i didnt want to come off as pissy and accusatory.  ;)

 

gawd, do i hate it when people pretend to know what they're talking about. male or female. it's just as bad as someone who shits all over your own interests just because they dont share them.  >:(  or maybe not quite as bad, but ALMOST AS BAD. i don't mind being corrected by someone who really does know more than i do, but not if they do so with a smug or patronizing "lol silly girl" expression or tone. my close friends never do this (except Foxie but as a joke), but at game tournies or nerd culture gatherings in the past i've had to pretend i was just a newcomer and even ask questions i already knew the answer to - just to avoid being assaulted by nerds who feel the need to test my cred... oi... 

 

It's a fair bit better now simply because of awareness. Sure, some of these guys were rude or malicious or patronizing just because they could be, but many may not have even aware of what they were doing. I've taken hostile retaliation stances before (quizzing THEM on Marvel knowledge, for instance), but that never ever turned out great. i'd rather just be myself at these events, neither hostile nor ditzy, but i am 100%. Not yet.

 

 

I've been here for one year +4 days.  I haven't seen anyone really say sexist comments in the way you're describing. Actually most of the people here are pretty mature and I think that's why I can relate and I stay here. Older people have experience in life hurting other's feelings so they know what to say and how it would affect someone. Take young (stinky) boys at a smash tourney whose egos are sensitive and easily shattered and throw a girl into the mix and you have a recipe for what you've dealt with. Boys are like that to each other, and it doesn't hurt their feelings as much as it hurts a girl's, especially the adjectives that they would throw at a girl in anger can be much more harmful. It's good that you're trying to improve it. I know it will get better with age and time. I'll never forget the time I've felt sexism directly wass when I was 12 in karate, we went to a tournament and the only opponent in my 110lb weight class was a 16 year old girl. I had to spar with her and she blocked all my punches and accidentally broke my nose, once there's blood the sparring has to end. All of my friends were laughing at me that I got beat a girl, but the worst was that she was saying it too from across the room along with her Dad who was proud his daughter beat a boy. Even though I tried to tell my friends she was really good they wouldn't listen and just laugh at me. So what sexism was hit me like a knee in my face. I actually thought about this two weeks ago when you said "Plant you got beat by a girl" LOL. :P But I know that was different lol.

 

Good for you Lazyy, I like when people try to actually change something rather than complain and not do anything. I hope you continue to find a fun environment with the people here. :) Also, holy shit I've been here for over a year!

 

the internet and its anonimity is different, defintely. at smash groups, i am among the oldest there (especially if its Smash 4), but here i appear to be among the youngest. age and experience really do play a part in tolerance and acceptance, but thats usually because over time someone with an ounce of intelligence will gradually realize their words and actions can hurt other people.

 

the funny thing is, while yes, i am most often harassed by younger boys, the Smash community is not usually where i encounter this problem. if I beat someone in Smash 4, they treat me with respect. occasionally a boy will get extremely salty, but i think they have that problem regardless. If i beat someone in Melee, i get really, really excited and hop up and down excessively because THAT NEVER HAPPENS. but every time it has, it garnered laughs.

 

  1. Well, first of all, I wanna say "I CALLED IT!!!" to everyone who I told I thought you were azn based off your Mii. Hehe, I don't expect it to look anything like you at all, except for her hair, but I think I've told people on the Mumble chat that I thought you were azn because you made an azn-y Mii, and now I can claim the cool points! :D
  2. ...A girl who plays games is instantly more attractive to me for it. Not necessarily physically, but more appealing desirable at least, which makes me happier to be around them...
  3. It's not like Twitch is overpopulated with females. They want to broadcast their gameplay just as much as all the other "attentionfags" who Twitch out their own shit. They're just playing their game and providing it for others who are interested to stream...
  4. What's my take on Bitches on Twitches? I like them.  :) I actually prefer them... And yeah, they're also prettier than the guys. This is the same mentality that causes me to pick a female character in Pokémon games every time I'm given the option.

  5. Do I expect most girls to suck more at video games than guys? On average, yes...

  6. Was I surprised by your performance the first time I played you in Sm4sh? Absolutely... But that's because you're not part of the norm. You are one of the relative few who break that mold. 

 

...and so on...

 

There's a lot to reply to in this, but i'll just do a few:

  1. Sometimes stereotyping works! yeh, i am half-Korean. i thought my Mii would give it away but apparently no. i've never been to Korea, tho. born in Canada, raised all across the US.
  2. This kind of remark, similar to what Morgil said, used to be offensive to me. Nowadays with more self-esteem and common sense, i know it's silly to be offended when someone might finds you attractive. hell, I'm more attracted to guys who're into games. unfortunately, its not like that narrowed down my options as much considering the type of people i would hang out with.... That said, I've often been creeped out by other people's comments of this nature. a male pro gamer's Twitter account, is predominately going to be filled with comments commending their skill or whatever. on a female pro gamer's Twitter account, you will find a much much larger percentage of "i have a huge crush on youuu" "ur hot" or the ever-classy "i want to fuk u". but hey, that's not the point I'm making.
  3. Twitch is all about the attention and when that attention can gain you money, well... it's hard for me to look at female Twitch streamers completely objectively. but they obviously know their audience. see, it can be a lot easier to be successful on Twitch or YouTube just because you are a girl playing games. boys will subscribe just because you're hot. being skilled or having an entertaining personalities are just bonuses rather than REQUIREMENTS that successful male streamers usually must meet.
  4. Bitches on Twitches. Yeh, i'm using that.  :3 But arent the characters in Pokemon games usually children?  :| i kid, i kid. i know what youre talkin about.
  5. I was expecting to write a lot about this but i ran out of steam and got lazyy. 
  6. there is an obvious difference between what is abnormal and what is wrong. being surprised to see a girl playing games is a perfectly natural reaction. we're just not as common. but it's those who feel threatened by it who are the problem. there are those who are not comfortable with the idea, whether or not they're vocal about it. i can usually tell the difference in a room full of gamers those who are impressed and those who are angry. I wish being a girl wouldn't play a factor in how impressive my Smash play is, but for now it's something to live with. and against those who get mad (either at me, themselves or the world) I'm competitive enough to recognize that being a girl can give me an advantage. getting your opponent mad can make them lose focus, hehe.  ;)

 

The fact that a great many people do not grow out of the "GIRL GAMERS EW ICKY" thing is really just revolting. We're living in a society where "manchildren" isn't just an insult but a 100% apt description of people that need a good hard slap and to stare into the face of reality until they shit their pants and realize how fucked they are. Won't happen though. At least not for awhile. I do think socially, time will get rid of those people. I certainly hope so. But then you have MRA groups out there who are legit pissed at the new Mad Max movie because there's a woman lead and she's really badass and that's just not right, well...fuck. I can't think of a movie with more testosterone in it than that one.

 

On the whole, I think it comes down to people growing up and improving naturally. Soon that will be less of an issue because there are more girl gamers than ever. But the other groups out there, well, the'll just be hate-filled shitcunts until the day they die. Society has improved so much over the last few hundred years, but it has a long ways to go, and there's just a certain breed of person that probably won't ever die out.

 

I really liked yer whole post, but i trim indiscriminately.

 

i'm really glad that no one's said anything i would find offensive yet. but text responses can help with that. usually when i bring up the topic in person, peolple tend to let something slip that wasnt so well thought out.

 

the point of my spiel was not to identify the manchildren who just have social issues and probably never leave their homes anyway. No, most people who end up saying something or acting in a way that's offensive to a female gamer are actually good people. there are tons of subtle, unconscious ways to come off as sexist when you dont even realize it.

 

i've mastered this half-concerned, half-annoyed expression that i give toward less considerate ones who I suspect mean well. more often than not, it causes them to rethink what they said and apologize, at which point i laugh it off. some are bit denser, and require a direct retort from me, while a few are completely socially inept and never catch their own mouths at which point i feel kinda sad for them...



#7 G-tech

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 06:00 PM

I think that second to last paragraph is quite telling . Even here, a place that you consider a "nice lil community," you still felt you needed to clarify that you're not trying to be a "preachy, pissed-off feminist." What's worse is that you still sort of expect that someone here will eventually treat you differently because of your gender. It speaks volumes about how your past experiences have conditioned you to expect the worst because you are a woman trying to express yourself on the internet. I dunno, I could be off base here, but that's how I interpreted it. Please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

 

It is very sad that people can't judge an individual based his or her own character. As Conker previously stated, some people take the negative experience(s) they had with an individual and apply it all. They only see things in absolutes. If a girl cheats on her boyfriend then somehow that means that all girls are whores that can't be trusted, or if a black guy that acts/talks "ghetto" it's a known fact that this person is a thug. It's ridiculous.

 

It's great that you are willing to express your opinions on the inequality of females in gaming, because that's the way to make this situation better. It may be a while before things improve, but, in due time, it will happen.



#8 CONKERSBADFURDAY

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Posted 27 May 2015 - 06:59 PM


i'm really glad that no one's said anything i would find offensive yet. but text responses can help with that. usually when i bring up the topic in person, peolple tend to let something slip that wasnt so well thought out.

 

the point of my spiel was not to identify the manchildren who just have social issues and probably never leave their homes anyway. No, most people who end up saying something or acting in a way that's offensive to a female gamer are actually good people. there are tons of subtle, unconscious ways to come off as sexist when you dont even realize it.

 

I think some of that is less about misogyny or hate and just pure ignorance. People don't know some little thing they say or do might be wrong because they've always done it or saw it on TV or in a movie or something, and it takes a real damn person telling them to stoppit that it clicks. But then, that can backfire because they think you're just being a snob or an angry feminist or some shit. "What do you mean I can't say that? I say that all the time." Sure you do; doesn't make it right, intelligent, or unhurtful.

 

But that comes down to how you showcase yourself. People respond to annoyance with more annoyance. Hate with more hate. Stupidity with more stupidity. I enjoy going into conversations on the net and being a bit trolly and dumb, but when it comes to seriously discussing a topic--no matter what it is--being respectful and empathetic goes way further than being angry.

 

Not accusing you or anyone, just vomiting out things I've experienced myself.

 

I think that second to last paragraph is quite telling . Even here, a place that you consider a "nice lil community," you still felt you needed to clarify that you're not trying to be a "preachy, pissed-off feminist." What's worse is that you still sort of expect that someone here will eventually treat you differently because of your gender. It speaks volumes about how your past experiences have conditioned you to expect the worst because you are a woman trying to express yourself on the internet. I dunno, I could be off base here, but that's how I interpreted it. Please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

Kinda shows you...well, so many things. That she has to clarify that she isn't a preachy, man-hating feminist really shows how far the tumblr crowd have gone and how much damage they've actually done to their own cause. I'm a feminist, and I'm not stupid, and I feel like that separates me from some of those really loud ones.

 

That she expects the past to repeat herself shows...well, history repeats itself. Nothing new there. But that we as a website are surprised shows how far apart we are from some of these issues at hand. Hate to pull the "cis white male" card, but without being INVOLVED, it's really hard to know what everything is really like on the other side.

 

I've been a member of this website for a very long time. We've had our moments here (like that one time I invited my 4chan troll friends here for some fun), but other than a few small things, we're a really, really nice place. Small and quiet, sure. Nintendo fanboys? yeah. Kinda. But we cool.



#9 Lame "PBluafnotr4d2" 87421F

PBluafnotr4d2

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Posted 08 June 2015 - 01:03 PM

I just thought of this. It ain't easy being Greenie. ^_^




Anyway, I suppose you're right any twitch. I never looked very far into it, but if you say that the point of it is to get as much attention and followers as possible, then I wouldn't call it girl anymore of an attention whore than that color and kind attentionfag. That would be a retarded double standard.

Edited by Plant42, 08 June 2015 - 01:06 PM.






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